My father passed away several years ago and I was honored to be at his side when he left this world. But as moving as that moment was, it is not my most vivid memory of him.

My father was a manual laborer in the steel industry and a lifelong union member. In fact, for most of my childhood years, he was a local union officer and president with the United Steelworkers in Johnstown, Pennsylvania. He worked in the Steel Mill for some 37 years, spanning from the heights to the depths of the steel industry in this country. It was his involvement in labor and management relations that inspired me to get my Master’s Degree in Labor Relations.

So I started my career on the opposite side of most everything that my father stood for as a union guy. I would argue that unions were anachronistic, had outlived their usefulness and led to the demise of the very industry that gave him his livelihood. He would listen to my diatribe, honed by my extensive 3 years of experience, or so. He never argued or told me that I was ungrateful.

While I was all too willing to talk down his ideology, he was all too happy to build me up and instill confidence in me. But he also cared enough to tell me the truth (at least as he saw it), unvarnished and as witnessed during his numerous rotations around the sun. Then he would end with more encouragement. He encouraged me to work hard, do my best and demonstrate that I was worthy of the next promotion…and the next. When the promotions came, he was always my most fervent congratulator.

Then one day it occurred to me.  He was always a fervent congratulator and a steadfast truth-teller.

I thought back to the times when I was a kid, and the hours upon hours that my father was on the telephone doing “union business.” I remember the calls coming in at all hours of the night. Guys in trouble at work for all sorts of reasons, from legitimate to fallacious. My father always held the conversation the same way. He would encourage them, build them up and instill confidence in them. Then he would tell them the truth, whether they wanted to hear it or not. He wrapped up with more encouragement.

After my father passed away and I was reflecting on his life, I came to appreciate his formula. He was a fantastic people developer, way ahead of his time.  His formula is as sophisticated as it is simple. Start with encouragement, instill confidence, speak the truth and encourage again.

I am honored to use my father’s formula as an integral part of my executive coaching practice. I think he would be pleased to know that his wisdom is benefiting a new generation of leaders.

This entry was posted on Friday, November 13th, 2009 at 8:12 pm and is filed under Career Advice, Leadership. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.