2009 might well be remembered as the year of horrible judgment. Unfortunate examples abound.
Who can forget South Carolina Representative Joe Wilson’s ridiculous outburst of “you lie” during a September address to Congress by the President. Or Kayne West’s idiotic impromptu on-stage appearance interrupting a well deserved bit of recognition for Taylor Swift at the VMA awards. Then there’s the grandaddy of all bad judgment purveyors, Tiger Woods.
While Wilson and West’s transgressions are somewhat mitigated by the fact that they were isolated examples of extraordinarily poor judgment (at least as far as we know), Tiger wins the prize for serial stupidity. Not only did he exercise poor judgment in the conduct of his life post-marriage, but he trumped his moral mistake with a morass of mental mistakes.
While it is arguably none of our business how he conducts his personal life, it is an arrogant miscalculation to actually make that argument. Especially when 90% of your fortune has come from pitching us products based at least partially on your squeaky clean image.
Woods, Wilson and West, these “three W’s” of anti-wisdom can attribute their respective gaffs to an important missing element in each of their lives. The missing ingredient is the presence of someone who said “no” or “wait a minute” or “do you really think that’s a good idea?” I call these people truth tellers.
While there is no shortage of such people early in our career when we are less successful, they begin to fade away as we climb the ladder until they are practically non-existent for those who make it to the top of their chosen professions. With the inevitable loneliness at the top comes isolation that is only interrupted by the continuous fawning of sycophants.
I make my living as an executive coach on a foundation of truth telling. I fill a void that so many leaders experience because they do not hear what they are missing. The feedback dries up slowly and insidiously over time, until the absence of such serves as a sort of unspoken validation of the person who does not receive it. That is until they scream at the President, scurry onto the stage, or find themselves featured on Access Hollywood for a month.
The good news is that you do not need me as a paid truth teller. People exist in your life who are willing to tell you the truth, if you ask sincerely and listen carefully. It is never too late to close your mouth and open your ears.
Here’s to better judgment in the new decade.